9 Million Reasons to Speak English

"To be or Not to Be" able to speak English was the burning issue of the last municipal election in Montreal, where the unilingual Louise Harel, was criticized for not being able to speak the language of Shakespeare.

Madame Harel was elegant about her lack of bilingualism and committed to improving if elected, but for some French language militants, English as a prerequisite for public office in Quebec was an outrageous affront.

The whole argument was really a tempest in a teapot, Anglos weren't going to vote for the separatist even if she could perform "Hamlet" backwards and brought up her lack of English as a cruel way to belittle her candidacy.

But French language militants swallowed the bait, hook, line and sinker and raged publicly about the injustice of it all.

Rising to her defence were those like Luc Thériault, president of Mouvement Montréal français who argued in a press conference that making knowledge of English an indispensable criterion to running for mayor of Montreal was a violation of a precept established by Bill 101, the Charter of the French language.

But the debate did lay bare the dangerous concept, currently in vogue in Quebec, that English is not that important, packaged with the equally condescending lie, that while it's always useful to speak another language, it isn't particularly necessary.

It's true that when teaching Cegep in Rimouski, selling hamburgers in Val D'Or or working for the government in Quebec City, one can get by quite nicely without any English. And so the argument goes, that for most Quebeckers learning English in school is unnecessary.


The myth that learning English isn't important is spun by militants to hide their paranoid delusion that English is a dangerous threat and an automatic road map to assimilation. So it's easier to say that English is just not that big a deal. 

And so smug, complicit officials in the education department, torpedo the teaching of English to the point that French students leaving high school are functionally unilingual.

It's a cruel trick to play on students, akin to telling them not to study algebra or science because for most, it's irrelevant to their future. 

Barefoot, pregnant and stupid, the philosophy of keeping the masses on the farm by refusing to let them visit the city, was the mantra of the Catholic Church for 350 fifty years. History repeats itself.

Perhaps speaking only French is fine when one chooses to spend one's whole life, living in the cloistered fish bowl of a unilingual Quebec, but dangerously cruel, when one aspires to more.

Luckily, many francophones refuse to drink this Kool-Aid of ignorance. They dream of success on an  international level and understand the importance of English.
Julie Payette and Marc Garneau would never have gone into space without English.
Celine Dion and Guy Laliberte would never have achieved their success without it.
It's the way of the world, like it or not.

And so congratulations to Jonathan Duhamel of Brossard (a Montreal suburb) for his victory in Las Vegas at the World Series of Poker's MAIN EVENT, the world's richest and most important poker tournament.

The 23 year old Quebecker beat out a field of over 7,300 players, both amateur and professional to claim the top prize of 9 million dollars.

Duhamel's fine grasp of the poker odds and strategy would never have mattered if he hadn't first mastered the first requisite of joining the world poker elite - speaking English.

To all those in Quebec who feed the lie that speaking English isn't important, Duhamel is the living proof that it isn't quite true.

Quebeckers have a right to be proud of his accomplishments, the enduring lesson is that Quebeckers can compete on a world level in just about any field.

For Jonathan, English was just a small part of his ascension to the top of the poker world, but a key element without which, he'd have gone nowhere.

Every time Quebec language militants propagate the lie that English isn't important and that Quebeckers can be successful without it, parents will point to Duhamel and other internationally acclaimed Quebeckers and will continue to insist that their children have the opportunity to become bilingual.
As long as the education department refuses to teach English, there will be pressure to send Francophone and Allophone children to private schools.

By refusing to teach English in a meaningful way, the Quebec education department remains an instrument of oppression, seeking to limit, rather than expanding student's horizons.

Listen to Jonathan deliver his victory speech in English.
For language militants and separatists, don't bother watching. It's a bitter reminder of realty.
If you're going to punish yourself, watch Jonathan drape himself in a Canadian flag, in a final rejection of everything you believe.

Quebec Towns Swimming in Cesspool of Corruption

If Quebeckers thought political corruption was limited to the Quebec Liberal Party and a few rotten apples in the city of Montreal, revelations last week showed just how badly the provinces' city and towns reek from the pervasive stench of corruption.

It would now appear that Maclean's magazine got it wrong about Quebec being the most corrupt province in Canada.
If the evidence presented last week in the Montreal's Journal de Montreal and Radio Canada's 'Enquete' is true, it's likely that Quebec is the most corrupt state/province in North America!

In a  blockbuster exposé, the newspaper and the investigative television show identified more disturbing  acts of corruption across the length and breadth of the province, in municipality after municipality.

Birds of a Feather- Mayors Robitaille & Marcotte

Two towns in particular, Mascouche and Terrebonne, were so rocked by allegations that angry citizens marched on town council meetings in a mob-like scene demanding that their respective mayors and their elected teams resign!
So frightened was, Jean-Marc Robitaille, Mayor of Terrebonne and Mascouche mayor  Richard Marcotte, that they didn't show up and announced that they were temporarily stepping down pending an investigation.
The allegations against Marcotte were pretty brutal including:

• a demand for a free house from a contractor
• Extorting a 5% commission on building projects for his party's political funds
• Buying condos from developers for under market value and then flipping them back to the same builder

As for  Terrebonne's mayor Jean-Marc Robitaille, he's in hot water over the sale of city property to a friend and political collaborator in which the properties were resold for nine times as much as they were bought from the city, for a profit of over a million dollars. One of the parcels was resold the same day that it was purchased, for a profit of $144,000!
About his relationship with Tony Accurso, the Montreal construction tycoon, at the center of several corruption scandals, the mayor was unequivocal. Asked if he ever vacationed aboard Mr. Accurso's infamous yacht, the mayor issued a forceful "NO COMMENT.'


The stink doesn't end in these two municipalities, another television exposé, this time targeting the city of Sagenauy over wasteful lawsuits and assorted conflicts, got it's feisty mayor Jean Tremblay in a lather. Defending himself and his city, he responded that it isn't up to Montrealers to make judgments about his administration, a priceless deflection! 

The mayor, by the way, has a penchant for expensive lawsuits and to date has invested over seven million dollars of city money in dubious litigation, including defending the city practice of praying to Jesus before council meetings. 


Disinterested Quebeckers choose over half its mayors and councillors by acclamation. Towns and cities across the province are run as private fiefdoms with the mayor and council running roughshod over the limited opposition that there is.
This leads to corruption, nepotism, favouritism, practices that are rampant with the few controls in place, easily ignored or sidestepped. 

One example of the abuse is the widespread practice of breaking up large contracts into many 'mini' contracts to stay under the $25,000 threshold, at which tenders are required by law.
The city of Laval recently placed a huge contract into the hands of a PPP, controlled by a city official, which effectively removed the power of oversight from opposition councillors. The mayor of Lachute is now under the gun for giving out untendered contracts.

The list of transgressions goes on and on and on........

The investigative stories on television have exposed a level of corruption that would scare the Italian Guardia di finanzia, the corruption police that battles the Mafia. 
It seems that in Quebec, to find corruption, one only has to look and not very hard at that.
The real problem remains with the lack of opposition to ruling cliques. 

Don't think that this is a 'French' only problem, respect for democracy is equally missing in Anglo towns such as the tiny rich Anglo preserve of Hampstead, where mayor William Steinberg has taken to excluding the lone opposition member from city business by holding meetings in private. Shame!


Last year, Quebec City's mayor, Regis Lebaume ripped into the city of Montreal for its corruption that has, in his opinion, left a stain on all municipal administrations.
Now Lebaume dropped another bombshell, by withdrawing his city from l'Union des municipalités du Québec, an association of Quebec municipalities, over his assertion that the organization lacked ethical respectability.
This was directly related to his strenuous objection of the election of Saint-Jérôme mayor Marc Gascon as president of the organization.
Mired in ethical investigations over campaign financing and dubious municipal contracts, the Laurentian mayor brazened it out, with the support of the association's administrators, who elected him unanimously.
It was too much for Lebaume who declared that it would be impossible for the city of Quebec to allow a mayor under a cloud of suspicion, speak in its name. LINK

The Premier announced that he will allow the municipalities to decide on their own package of integrity reforms, a policy akin to letting the fox guard the hen house.

It's clear that the situation is out of control.
The province needs a universal set of rules and a powerful independent anti-corruption police force.

The anti-collusion agency created by the premier and headed by Jacques Duchesneau is woefully underfunded at two million dollars and is restricted to government contracts at the Ministry of Transport.
At any rate, rumour has it that Duchesneau is on the outs with the Premier over some sort of alleged skeleton in his closet, that has recently started to rattle rather loudly.

Many years ago an executive at a record store chain (now defunct) told me a funny story about a detective agency that approached him with an offer to test the integrity of the employees handling the cash register in his stores. He asked the agency how they would go about finding dishonest employees and they told him that they'd enter the store and offer to pay for their 'purchase' in cash, a much  reduced price, which the cashier would pocket.
"That's it" he answered "Doesn't sound very impressive. Do you really think employees would cheat with a total stranger?" 
At any rate he gave the detective agency  a shot and low and behold the first day on the job, a detective called and said that one of the managers was caught in the sting.
Surprised the boss sent a supervisor to fire the employee and run the store temporarily. The next day the same thing happened again and the boss, already short with personnel, sent the regional supervisor to take over the store,
The third day, another store, another crook.

The exasperated boss told the agency to stop visiting his stores, he had no more personnel to take over!!

I guess if we want corruption in Quebec towns and cities to disappear, we need to order the newspapers and the television shows to stop investigating.

It seems like the the only way out......

Quebec Unions - Let Ottawa and Our Children Pay for Deficits

A group of Quebec's largest unions got together and published a letter, "Déclaration commune de l'Alliance sociale - Un autre Québec est possible" arguing against the disengagement of the state from the economy and against any proposed spending cuts.

It's always interesting to hear arguments that fly in the face of common sense and this letter doesn't disappoint. That the nonsense below comes from a group of union leaders that represent over one million Quebec workers is all the more depressing.

To read the original letter in French go here.

Interestingly Le Devoir has referred to this coalition of unions as 'progressives,' although I can't imagine why.

"For many years we have seen in Quebec an expression of a dominating idea that tirelessly repeats the mantra advocating the disengagement of the state, privatization of public services, and laissez-faire market economics . This phenomenon has gained momentum, thanks to the worst financial crisis and economic downturn in the last sixty years.

The preparation of the last Quebec budget has also resulted in a well-orchestrated strategy of factual distortion, half-truths and fear mongering of the worst kind.

To summarize, we are poorer and more indebted than elsewhere, while benefiting from broader public services and social programs. In sum, according to this view, we are living beyond our means. And the situation will only worsen with the aging of the population. (This part is actually true...editor)

We are served up the same depressing diagnosis in relation to the state of the economy: lagging productivity, anemic investment, stagnant population, etc.. And we could go on and on with a long litany of alleged failures.

All this serves as a backdrop to justify a shift toward privatization and the pricing of public services on the principle of 'user pay' and this, in order to  directly place on the shoulders of  users the increased cost of funding these services.

However, these guidelines can only create more inequality and hardship for the less fortunate, as far as social rights and economic rights are concerned.

Progressive Solutions

To balance these public demonstrations of self-flagellation,  the 'Social Alliance' was formed. To do this, we intend to publicize alternatives that will demonstrate that it is necessary to have a strong state if we want to have a vibrant economy and a better redistribution of wealth. (Oh, oh, more government intervention. Redistribute more of the wealth? ...editor)

Based on the concerns of the groups forming the Alliance, we have identified targets to influence the trajectory of the provincial budget next spring.

Budget cuts and balance

The government must end its program of fiscal restraint in all directions, because, under the pretext of an early return to balanced budgets, it is cutting services to the population already weakened by years of cuts and reforms in a most inappropriate manner that will  deprive it of those instruments needed to meet new needs. (A call for increased government spending...editor)

Rising tuition is a false solution to the problems of financing higher education which would hit the brunt of the poorest students and their families. This merely diverts attention from the need and urgency to make major public investments in education. The same pressing needs are felt in regard to services for young children, the elderly, and that underspending in health and social programs and for an efficient civil service. (a blanket call for increased government spending...editor)

To restore a balanced budget, we must consider a longer time frame, (a proposal to run deficits for longer periods of time...editor) especially since the weight of the deficit compared to Quebec's economy is one of the lowest among industrialized countries. (I'm speechless!... Can anyone explain this? Quebec's deficit is among the lowest?...editor)

If the magnitude of the debt that we bequeath to future generations must be taken into account, we must also worry about the state we leave them public services and social programs. This too is part of equity between generations.
(Justifying dumping the debt on our children ...editor)

The fairness of the tax measures

While studies show that we are paying too much for our drugs, we believe that the health contribution amounting to $200 per adult, regardless of income, is a regressive, unwarranted and pernicious. (Against user fees ...editor)

We also believe that the tax system for those with very high incomes should be overhauled. For example, a 4th level of 28% should be added to the tax table for income above $ 127 000, as is in the  federal system. The corporate tax should also be tightened in order to limit tax avoidance and loopholes of all kinds. (Less than 2% of Quebeckers make over $100K, even doubling their tax rate wouldn't put a dent in the deficit...editor)

Other measures

Similarly, we will want to ensure that the exploitation of our natural resources is in a sustainable development perspective that entails economic benefits for the people and the Quebec government. (Plain spin ...editor)

We must also ensure that the federal government substantially enhances its contribution to support the provinces while respecting their jurisdiction. (Yikes! Canda should substanially increase aid to Quebec!  Apparantly 8 billion in equalization is not enough! ...editor)

Economic development

We expect to enact strong measures to ensure the vitality of the manufacturing sector and to help create jobs in a sustainable development perspective. We expect to enact measures that enhance the Quebecois know-how and encourage the modernization of equipment and access to technology. Measures that recognize the vitality of our service businesses, measures that stimulate the social economy. (Whaaat? ...editor)

For this, we rely on the establishment of a social dialogue that would focus the true contribution of workers to the development of work organization and innovation in enterprises. (Pay workers more ...editor)

Companies and public institutions should promote the retention of jobs and make strong commitments to invest in training. Thereby promoting the development of skilled workers and thus creating workers better able to cope with changes in the labour market and the increasing environmental issues,  these are quality jobs that we provide. (Pay workers more ...editor)

This is not only a concrete way to create wealth, but also a better way to distribute this wealth . (Workers deserve a bigger slice of the pie ...editor)
We understand the difficulties that Quebec society is facing. We also recognize the challenges that arise, especially regarding the reconciliation between economy and environment. We want to meet these challenges, as we have done collectively in the past with some success. But we will not ransack our public services and our social programs to do this. We will do so by strengthening the levers of state economic intervention. (More government intervention is better ...editor)
We strongly believe that these progressive solutions will enable society to continue moving forward.

Each member of the Social Alliance will, in the coming months,  educate the people of Quebec about the alternatives to the dominant discourse on public finances and by Spring, will undertake coordinated  action on a regional or national basis.

Signed ,

FTQ, CSN, CSQ, CSD, SFPQ, APTS, SPGQ, FEUQ, FECQ

So let's summarize;

• Ottawa should give more money to Quebec.
• The Quebec government should increase spending.
• The Quebec government should run bigger deficits for even longer periods of time.
• The Quebec government should spend more money on the civil service.
• Quebec workers should be paid more and get a bigger slice of the economic pie.
• The Quebec government should control more of the economy.
• Rich people should pay more taxes.
• Companies should pay more taxes.

Progressive?

Falardeau versus Richler- Who Should be Honoured?

French and English Quebeckers, Montrealers in particular, live with the paradox that public street names honour historical figures that represent heroes to one linguistic group, who may very well be villains to the other side.
No better example is the back-to-back Montreal streets of MONTCALM and WOLFE, which honour the two opposing commanding generals at the Battle of the Plains of Abraham.

Americans who pass through the tiny Quebec town of St. Georges de Beauce are confounded by the sight of the Auberge 'Benedict Arnold.' While it is understandable that across borders, one man's hero is another man's traitor, it gets a little complicated when the phenomena occurs within one single jurisdiction.

While it's easy to accept the dichotomy of honouring two opposites when the historical foundation is buried in the distant past, it's not so easy, when the honouree is a recently deceased personality, a well-known heel or hero, once again depending on a particular point of view.

And so there remains those who are displeased that one of Montreal's most important arteries was renamed to honour René Levesque, Quebec's first openly sovereignist Premier and likewise, Quebec nationalists are none too pleased about flying in and out of Montreal's re-named Pierre-Elliot Trudeau airport.

While other controversies swirl over the appropriateness of allowing street names to continue to bear the names of personalities whose traits or deeds would never qualify them for such honorific today, as in the case of Jeffrey Amherst, an advocate of genocide and Lionel Groulx, a rabid and vociferous antisemite, today we face a different dilemma.

We'd like to believe that we'd support the naming of a street based on the contributions and accomplishments of a candidate, but it's hard not to let political feelings interfere. I'm reminded of what Mark Twain once said, "There is nothing so weak as a virtue untested."

This week, coming up towards the tenth anniversary of the death of Mordechai Richler, the inevitable request to have a street named after him was made by two city of Montreal councillors, who've started a petition to gather support. Link

Although one of Canada's greatest authors, Richler remains a villain in much of French Quebec for his scathing criticism of Quebec society in his book, "Oh Canada! Oh Quebec," a biting indictment of historical Quebec, portrayed as tribal and antisemitic.

His reference to Quebecoise women as 'sows',  forced by the Church to pump out as many children as possible, earned him the undying enmity of the nationalist movement.

Lost in all this, is the fact that Richler was an equal opportunity insulter. In his most famous book, "The Apprenticeship of Duddy Kravitz," Richler's unflattering portrayal of his own Jewish community was typically unkind;

"But though Richler never had a flattering word to say about his central subject, Montreal Jews, or about the estranging environment of Quebec nationalism in which they increasingly found themselves lost—when his deadpan account of Quebec's absurd language wars was published in this magazine, in 1991, it became a literary and political schande* without precedent in his home town—he still became a local legend and then a kind of national landmark." THE NEW YORKER
(*Yiddish for 'shame'...ed)

To many nationalists, Richler was racist and cruel. Although most haven't even read his work and understand little of his caustic and acerbic style, they take it on faith that he is the epitome of evil, a Quebec-basher extrordinaire. Notwithstanding his success or fame, naming a street after such a character, talent aside, is an anathema. Lowbrow nationalists like Mario Beaulieu of the Société Saint-Jean-Baptiste de Montréal, are already howling in protest at the thought of Rue Mordechai Richler. LINK
 

In many respects, Quebec's Pierre Falardeau is a French version of Mordechai Richler. (or vice-versa).

A talented filmmaker who gave us the immortal character ELVIS GRATTON, there isn't any doubt that his artistic legacy remains an important part of Quebec culture.

Sharing not only Richler's artistic talent, Falardeau was also every bit as sarcastic and cruel as Richler.
 
He was a rabid nationalist whose dislike of Canada and anglophones bordered on the hysterical. Mr. Falardeau's extreme political view of the English and his penchant to shoot off his mouth, and his great good fun doing it, was particularly irritating.

Richler was considered by many Quebec Jews as being too negative and cruel. So too was Falardeau, as many Francophones considered him simplistic and uncouth and his rants against Canada and Anglos embarrassing.
Here's a particularly nasty skit of Falardeau making fun of anglos. Link(in French)

But politics aside, nobody can deny both these men's talent and the impact of their art on Quebec society.

While many hated the idea of Quebec as a racist society, Richler helped Quebeckers confront their past.

As for Falardeau, his most important work ELVIS GRATTON decried Quebec federalists as dim-witted, conservative and racist. Although not my cup of tea, his pro-sovereignist message was certainly entertaining and thought provoking.

Should one or the other get a street named after him?

It might be a sweet irony to see Rue Falardeau bisect Richler Street, the ultimate paradox of two cultures sharing a common address.

Perhaps we can rename the Lionel Groulx metro station after Richler and Amherst Street after Falardeau.

Come to think of it, nothing would change, hero or villain, the argument would continue....

Quebec Hookers Should think Twice about Going Legal

A recent Ontario court decision striking down aspects of Canada's prostitution laws has Quebec hookers and their support groups excited about legalization.

"....a coalition of academics, feminists, sex trade workers and human rights experts are to gather at the Simone de Beauvoir Institute to support a recent decision by Ontario Superior Court Judge Susan Himel striking down key sections of Canada's Criminal Code regulating prostitution.

"We believe sex workers have the right to live and work safely, in an environment free of violence and discrimination," a statement signed by 40 professors, lawyers and community activists says." LINK

Before embracing legalization, sex traders might just want to consider what they are getting themselves into, it might not be such a good deal.

Prostitution is not an easy vocation. For all but the exclusive high end "Eliot Spitzer' type of hooker, it can be dangerous and hard work that isn't particularly lucrative. 

Unfortunately, legalization won't change any of that.

What would legalization bring hookers?

Certainly they could crawl out from the murky undershadows of society, but if they think they will earn a measure of acceptance in the mainstream, they are sorely mistaken. Legal or not, hookers are on the bottom of the respect list. While men may be ambivalent, women hate them with a passion.

On the positive side, legalization may release hookers from the stranglehold that their pimps exercise over their lives, brutally dictating their work conditions and taking a sizable chunk of their earnings.

But with legalization, prostitutes would be encumbered with the responsibilities of good citizenship including the obligation to obey laws and pay taxes on income.
Sadly, This would eliminate any savings they would gain by getting rid of their of pimp. Come to think of it, pimps provide a certain level of protection and a steady stream of customers.
The government...not so much. Hmmm..

It's true that prostitutes could deduct the tools and instruments of their trade as expenses, but condoms, spiked heels, mini skirts and fishnet stocking are a negligible expense.  

As for becoming eligible for government benefits, as independent contractors, they wouldn't qualify for the majority of programs and benefits offered to ordinary salaried workers.

One of the most important benefits of legalization, would be the de-criminalization of the 'bawdy house.' Hookers could safely use their homes to ply their trade.

But they'd surely be required to get a special business permit and authorities would almost certainly dictate where these businesses could be located. Neighbours would no doubt object to having a whorehouse next door, so residential neighbourhoods would be out. The combo brothel/home would probably be sent to the industrial parks on the outskirts of cities, not a convenient arrangement.

Inevitably, the government would set up whorehouse standards.

Could the children of prostitutes be allowed to stay in such premises? 

Would sheets be required to be changed after each customer? Come to think of it, would sheets be required at all?
Would the whorehouse be subject to standard hours of operation?
Would they be forced to close on statutory holidays like Christmas and Easter?
If whipped cream, edible panties or any other consumable was part of the 'experience,' would the establishment require a restaurant license?

Then there's the requisite safety regulations.

Hookers would certainly be required to provide health certificates and to submit to costly HIV and STD testing on a regular basis.
Of course risky sexual behaviour would be banned by government health authorities. Going bareback would no longer be an option, even if customers paid more. Condoms would be mandatory and perhaps even rubber gloves as well.

Streetwalkers would be liable to additional rules including a special permit that would guarantee them exclusivity on a certain corner- for a price.
Limits on the height of spiked heels that they wear would be imposed as a health measure and they would not be allowed to walk the streets more than two hours without a scheduled break.

At dusk they'd be required to wear a reflective vest for their own safety and that of the drivers.

So as not to block traffic, drivers would be required to park their cars and get out of traffic while negotiating prices with streetwalkers. Hookers leaning into open car windows in the right-of-way would be subject to fines.

When approaching Johns for the first time, the first language of contact would have to be French. Hookers could switch to English after a specific request, but no John could demand to be serviced in English.

Then there would be the competency tests.
There is a certain level of skill required and the province would demand a 'Sex Worker' license, similar to a driver's license.  Candidates would be required to take a course and then answer a multiple choice questionnaire at the licensing bureau.

Cash transactions would be discouraged and hookers would be required to use portable Interact machines which could process credit and debit cards. They'd be required to charge provincial sales tax as well as GST and remit these sums to the government on a monthly basis. On the bright side, the devices would allow hookers to reward loyal clients with 'Air Miles.' Of course prostitutes would have to provide clients with a written receipt for services rendered, with copies kept securely for five years in case of an Revenue Quebec audit.

Undercover government inspectors would be dispatched to make sure that there are no undisclosed cash transactions and that hookers were in possession of the government issued license at all times.

Before engaging in sex, clients would be required to fill out a consent form, swearing that they were free of sexually transmitted diseases and providing a list of their last three sexual partners 'just in case'
Hookers would be required to keep these records on file for up to a year.

A code of ethics and truth in advertising rules would be imposed.
Discreet colour-coded lapel pins, to be worn while working, would indicate whether the prostitute is male, female, transsexual or a transvestite. No "Crying Game" surprises allowed!
Hookers who haven't been 'artificially' enhanced would be allowed to wear a special 'green' pin.
Prostitutes engaged in role-playing would be barred from wearing 'Catholic schoolgirl attire' or sucking on a lollipop, wearing pig-tails or in anyway conveying the image that they are under-aged. They would also be barred from portraying schoolteachers, nurses, policewomen or judges as this would be considered demeaning to the professions. Portraying lawyers and politicians would remain legal. Dominatrices would be barred from using racist German or Russian accents or wearing Nazi regalia. Boot-licking would be banned as unsanitary.

If handcuffs, whips, chains or any other devices of a potentially dangerous nature were to be employed, a safety range officer would be mandatory.  All equipment of this nature would be subject to a yearly safety inspection. Foreign 'objects' that were 'insertable' would be subject to proper sterilization standards.

In the interest of honesty, hookers would be discouraged from lying about studly performance by their clients or exaggerating the size of certain 'equipment.'
At the end of each session the prostitute would be obliged to hand the client a card with the phone number and Internet address of the Quebec Sex Works Licensing Board, just in case he had a complaint. In the case of any such complaint the prostitute would be obliged to put the client's money in trust until such time as the disagreement would be adjudicated. An agency, similar to the Rental Board would be created in anticipation of problems.

I imagine that before long some prostitutes, will find their new found freedom and legitimacy a bit too much to handle.
Some will likely slip back into their old ways and go underground.

Much to the chagrin of law-abiding hookers, these 'pirates,' unencumbered by the legal and financial obligations of legitimacy, will undercut the prices the regular hookers charge.

With no expenses other than a new pimp and no taxes and licensing fees to pay, they will likely make more money and charge less.

"How can we compete with these bandits?" screams the head of the Association of Independent Sex workers of Quebec. "It isn't fair!!!"

The moral of the story--- "Be careful what you wish for!"