Let's Not Forget Coyote the Fans

While I usually write about anglophone issues in Quebec, I can't help but feel a pang of sympathy for the fans of the Phoenix Coyotes and since I haven't read a word in support for the loyal fans of the NHL team anywhere, I shall endeavour to say a word on their behalf.

As an ex-Montreal Expos fan, I as well as thousands of other people can attest to the painful experience of losing a professional sports team.

Five years later, it still hurts.

Although I'd like to see another team in Canada, the present drama is cruel and unusual punishment for the Coyote fans.
Like in Montreal or in Winnipeg, or in Quebec City, perhaps there isn't enough interest and perhaps the financials don't add up, but it doesn't mean that there aren't any passionate fans in Phoenix.


It's sad to see these people ignored.
Not one word about them from any commentator or sports writer and in fact the only one to speak out on their behalf is Commissioner Gary Bettman who's interest is as sincere as a three dollar bill.

Jim Basille and Gary Bettman appear to be two hard asses taken from the same mold.
I hope the affair doesn't drag out as it did in Montreal.
The worst case scenario would be a long drawn out court room affair.

It's Easy to be a Language Racist.

Last month, the thoroughly stupid Anglo-bashing book "ANGLAID" by Michel Brulé, made its appearance in bookstores across the province. The book makes some pretty dumb claims about the English language including the assertion that the language itself, is racist and ugly. I would have ignored the book, but for the fact that several nationalist organizations have begun promoting the book as a valid intellectual exercise.

There's nothing in the book remotely interesting or intellectually stimulating. It's mean and nasty tenor speaks more to Mr. Brulé obvious inferiority complex, than to any inference upon the English language.

About the only thing I agree with Mr. Brulé is that French is a beautiful language, which I heartily admit.
It is without a doubt a pleasure to be able to listen the fluid, rich, rhythmic and lyrical language that is French.

It's too bad that Mr. Brulé doesn't speak French.

No, what Mr. Brulé actually speaks is 'Quebecoise', a bastardized version of the language of Moliere, more closely related the incomprehensible crap that is spoken in Haiti, than what is spoken in France.

Listening to Quebecoise is as painful as is listening to the 'Ebonics' of the American black ghetto. Both groups make the argument that their version of their mother language is meritorious and rich, but nobody in France or in America would agree with that nonsense.

Both represent a dumbing down of a language which they clearly are unable to master properly. French is a difficult language to master and with a high school dropout rate of over thirty percent in Quebec, it's no wonder that the language has degenerated, exactly as has English, in the poor black ghettos of the United States.

While the French (in France) can still understand what Quebeckers say, they don't particularly like what they hear. Quebeckers who visit France are well-attuned to the snickers their language receives when they open their mouths.
If you think there are language purists here in Quebec, try visiting France and speaking Quebecoise.
In fact Quebec movies that do make over to France are usually dubbed into 'Parisian French' and if that isn't the ultimate insult, I don't know what is.

One of the problems of keeping French alive and relevant is the fact that there are so few nations still speaking it. The world-wide 'Francophonie' (as the brotherhood of French nations is known) is made up of just a few civilized countries that include France, part of Belgium (where 40% of the people speak French), part of Switzerland (where 20% of the people speak French) and part of Canada (where 22% of the people speak French). The rest of the membership is made up largely by a motley assortment of banana republics in Africa. The days when French was a common second language or used in trade and diplomacy are long gone. With just over 120 million speakers (less than speakers of Malay-Indonesian), French no longer has the critical mass to maintain itself as an international language and to maintain a world-wide culture. It is predicted that Quebecoise and French will be unrecognizable to each other within twenty-five years.

French is bad because ... Blah...blah... blah

Had enough?

I could go on and on and I could even write a book like Michel Brulé , only this one, bashing the French language instead of English.

But to what end?

If you are a francophone and still reading this post, let me apologize. I'm sure you didn't enjoy what you just read.

The purpose of the above rant was not to denigrate or humiliate your language, but to make the point that in life there is an argument to made for anything, that's why we have so many lawyers.

Writing a book insulting someone else's language is about as wise as telling your mother-in-law that she is ugly.

Why? Why? Why?

ANGLAID is such a book, stupid and cruel in every respect.

It is written expressly for French language racists, nobody other than a fanatic would bother reading such drivel.

Translation Follies

If you'd like a good laugh you can find some wonderful translations errors over at ameriquebec. The nationalist site is frothing at the mouth over some pretty amusing gaffes on the French side of various products sold in the province.
I have to admit, nothing beats this boo boo by a company selling a shovel that they call 'Snow Pusher.' which they translated into- " Snow Drug Dealer" (Pusher=Drug Dealer).

You've got to admit it's a bit funny.
Unfortunately, the language crusaders over at Ameriquebec take a dim view of such gaffes and have called for a boycott in what can only be described as a comical over-reaction that is typical of the religious language zealots.

Obviously this small company used an Internet translation service like Google Translate or Yahoo's Bable Fish.
These sites are notoriously inefficient and should never be used in any official capacity.

Here's what Ameriquebec said about the affair.

" N’hésitez pas à faire circuler ces images et à boycotter les compagnies qui nesedonnent pas la peine de se payer ne serait-ce qu’un traducteur et qui secontententplutôt d’utiliser des traducteurs automatiques sur internet."

Here's how two of the Internets most popular translation sites handled the text;

Babel Fish
"Do not hesitate to make circulate these images and to boycott the companies which do not try hard to be paid would be this only one translator and which is rather satisfied to use automatic translators on Internet."
Google Translate;
"Feel free to circulate these images and to boycott companies that did not bother to pay even a translator who only tend to use automatic translators on the internet."

Arghh!!!!
As a lark, I sent the Lord's Prayer through both translation softwares sites and here is the result;

Babel Fish
"Our Father, which be with the skies, that your name is sanctified, that your reign comes, that your will is made on the ground as with the sky. Give us aujourd' today our bread of this day. Forgive us our offences as we also forgive with those which offended us. And do not subject to us with temptation, but to us evil delivers, because c' with you qu' is; the reign, the power and glory belong, at the centuries of the centuries. Amen."

Google Translate;
"Our Father, who art in heaven, be thy name, Thy kingdom come; Thy will be done on earth as in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. Forgive us our offenses as we also forgive those who have offended. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil, because of you qu'appartiennent the kingdom, the power and glory for ever and ever."Amen.

As you can see, Google Translate is far superior, but I wouldn't use it to translate my resumé, that's for sure.

I spent the last thirty years in the retail business and can tell you that there isn't a spelling mistake that goes unnoticed by the language crusaders.
Every week our company would receive nasty e-mails and calls from language crusaders complaining about this and that mistake. When we'd direct them to the manufacturer, they were indignant, as if we were responsible.
The letters all contained the familiar vernacular of the nationalist movement.
"Insult" "Humiliation" "Disgrace" blah...blah... blah...

Most of the errors were made by small companies based outside Quebec (In Canada) who relied their Chinese manufacturers to get the artwork and text right. We sometimes helped out and proofed the material before it went to press.

There's really no excuse for these gaffes, but perhaps the small size and limited budget can be used as a mitigating factor.

But translation errors are a two way street and there are many examples of mangled English, including the Government of Quebec, who has the budget and wherewithal to know and do better.
See my recent post about an advertisement by Transports Quebec.
Although the ad was obviously translated by a non-anglophone, I would never claim to be humiliated or insulted. It was just a translation mistake, without malice of intent.
Sometimes a mistake is just a mistake.

AmeriQuebec, GET A LIFE!

Dangerous Radar Trap Framed by Idiotic Billboard

The implementation of a radar trap at Decarie and Jean Talon, in Montreal, is so dangerous that it belies any pretense by the police that they are acting to promote safety. It's strictly a cash grab.

Parked four lanes over, the police nab 'speeders', who are exiting the Decarie Expressway, going up the ramp leading to the Decarie service road.

The problem is, that the cops are forced to dash out into the traffic, across four lanes to nab the speeder. Traffic comes to a screeching and dangerous halt as the offender is stopped and then escorted over to the shoulder. For those of you who don't know Montreal, the Decarie service road is one of the busiest arteries in Montreal and the folly of grinding traffic to a halt, to pursue a traffic ticket is dangerously stupid.

Perhaps, the city wouldn't need to raise funds in this manner, if it would stop wasting so much money.
Take for example, the idiotic billboard above the radar trap. Paid for by the city, it purpose is to remind us that Montreal is a great place to live.

Montreal Youth Canada's Most Dangerous Criminal

The sentencing of a Montreal teen to three years in prison and three years probation should frighten us all. The boy, as a fifteen year old, violently beat and murdered 14 year-old Francesca Saint-Pierre in August, 2007 in Rivieres des Prairies.

The teen who cannot be named because of his age, benefited from lax sentencing rules under the Canada Youth Protection Act which will allow him to return to the streets in just three years, a frightening prospect.
The youth is so violently crazy that the chances of him not re-offending are remote.

The victim and the murderer were living in a group home for troubled teens when he lured his victim into a park and bludgeoned her to death with a baseball bat.
When asked why he did it, he answered glibly- "Because I just wanted to get rid of her."

The girls' mother had already warned the home that he was exploiting Francesca sexually and posed a dangerous threat, but her pleas went unanswered.

During most the trial the boy sported an evil grin and smirked or laughed at the victim's family. Officials were quick to apologize and attributed the behavior to the high level of medication he was under the influence of.
The youth is diagnosed with bipolar disease, Tourette syndrome, Attention Deficit Disorder and is deeply narcissistic with a God-like complex.
Quite a shopping list of cuckoo!

Of course he is on full time anti-psychotic drugs.

He was first diagnosed with mental problems at just two years of age and at three years old he was sent to a foster home.
At age five his mother, (another whack-job) murdered his baby sister and committed suicide.
At five years old the father was deported from Canada for various criminal activities.

From then on it was foster care and mental institutions for the boy.

If ever there existed a ticking time bomb, this boy is it.
It's too bad that he can't be held indefinitely.

It is extremely frustrating to be inhibited from naming him or publishing his picture, but it's against the law.

Can't you just wait the three short years for his release?